462-0614

Lost in Translation

462-0614 - Spectre of the Brocken: #title

“Hello?”

“Yeah, I’m lookin’ for Charles.”

“There ain’t no Charles here.”

“Ain’t, ain’t a word, asshole.”

“Who the fuck is this?”

“I’m lookin’ for Charles.”

“I said, there ain’t no Charles here.”

“Listen, you… Listen, you patsy fuck, you must know at least one person named Charles.”

“Well, now that I think of it, I do.”

“Well, there ya go. Now put him on the phone.”

“Wait, you asked me if I knew anyone named Charles and I do, but not here. He’s my—”

“Listen, I’m going to make this very simple. Put Chuck on the phone or I’m coming over there and laying bricks. Charles gave me this number to call when I landed in LA, I’m here now, so could you PLEASE get Chuck?”

“Listen, man, I DON’T KNOW ANYONE HERE NAMED CHARLES OR CHUCK!”

“YA DON’T HAV-TA-YELL, CHRIST, IS THIS 462-0614?”

“YEAH, IT IS!”

“WELL, THEN PUT CHUCK ON THE PHONE!”

“SIR, I AM HANGING UP NOW!”

“IF YOU CALL ME SIR AND HANG UP ON ME, I WILL BRING A WAR TO YOUR DOORSTEP! IT IS IMPERATIVE THAT I SPEAK TO CHUCK AT THIS MOMENT!”

“I… DON’T… KNOW… ANY… CHUCK…, CHARLES… OR… WHOM EVER… THE FUCK… YOU ARE LOOKING FOR!”

“Jeez, that’s all you had to say.”

Click.

462-0614: You can find this story in the collection “Spectre of the Brocken: Halo for the Observer.”

#title
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Ran Kime Writer
Ran Kime, a writer, poet, musician and recluse from New Hampshire, crafts abstract stories, flash fiction & poetry that probe the psyche. His collections include “Spectre of the Brocken: Halo for the observer” and “Way Past Tipsy & Other Silent Cries for Help”.